I've been playing instruments for as long as I could do my times tables, which I suppose could vary, depending on what type of schooling you had. Let's just say, I've always enjoyed playing music. My favorite classes were my music classes, like orchestra...I absolutely loved learning to play a violin. When I was even younger than that, I attempted piano. I played for a little while, but no more learning beyond my very first recital. My neighbor taught me, and she eventually moved away, and I was so bummed about this news that I refused any more lessons from any other instructor. I knew it wouldn't be the same. And thus, the death of my piano lessons. It's a shame, because I think if I had continued, I would be hanging out with the likes of Norah Jones or Madeleine Peyroux or something, singing all jazzy and playing my heart out on a piano. More recently, I would think that it was just me being really young and indecisive. After all, I was only 8 or 9 years old. However, I gave piano lessons another shot. At age 20, I wandered into a music shop to sign up for some lessons over the summer. Once a week, probably costing more money than I had at the time. But who cared? I was really going to kick ass at piano this time! So I sat there at my lessons in a room the size of a small closet, trying my very best to get through the basics all over again. But it was more difficult that I had imagined. Discouraging, in fact. And of course, reality eventually reared its ugly head, and I could no longer gather the money to pay for the lessons. And honestly, I was starting to lose interest yet again. A relentless cycle of piqued interest, lack of satisfaction, and then eventual "calling it quits." I still play around on the piano. I haven't given up completely, and I probably never will. But I always wonder if I will ever get over that hump, and just go completely for it. I wonder if I'll ever have the time to take on the commitment required to excel at reading music, and playing well. I'm a good starter, but I'm not the best finisher...
Guitar has been more successful. I'm probably the most consistent with this, playing at least once every few days. Nothing special, just playing songs I enjoy playing. I'm sure I'm at a point where I could venture out and make something of my own. But I'm a little uncertain of how to start doing that. I don't know why...I probably just have to accept my beginner status of writing music, and just go with what I can do. It's hard though. I'm way too self-aware, sometimes. I'm working on it, but it's hard to get rid of that feeling. But again, it's a process I'm willing to go through. Maybe I can start with just writing lyrics or something, and go with that. I'm maintaining healthy optimism, more so than before. Although, I'm still feeling a slightly rocky phase coming that will either make me a rock star or make me cry. We shall see. I suppose I'll just take it one instrument at a time.
And Spanish? Yeesh, don't even get me started. I can't even say that I'm trying. Why? Well, because I'm not. However, the other night I discovered that I have a friend who can help me practice whenever I feel the need to...which ought to be all the time. I'm going to make the effort though...so says I, at this very moment. Again, we shall see. I need to just live in a Spanish-speaking country for a while. I'd like to, and it's one of many short-term/long-term goals I hold dear. I don't think I'd ever come back though. Which might be okay.
So these are the major skills I am trying to work on, slowly but surely. I'm still young, so I have time. And I believe in the potential of young people like myself, who have big dreams. God, that sounds so cheesy after reading it aloud. Oh well, it's been typed and there's no turning back. Just facing forward, toward our BIG, fat dreams.
No comments:
Post a Comment